Sunday, November 30, 2008
You'd think I was starving him
Josiah just came up to me and asked, "So, is there anything you'd like me to do?"
"What?!" I wondered, "Is he offering to do some chores?"
I asked him what he meant...since my initial thought was, well, unlikely.
"Oh, I dunno...I thought maybe you'd feed me or something."
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Grace was sitting at the table during the lesson/game of chess, seemingly hanging onto every word. I asked her if she was going to learn how to play chess, and she answered, "Yes, when I turning 5."
Grace, seeing a political ad on TV, points and excitedly says, "Bakamama!" One more example of Obama's celebrity status? I don't know. I think maybe our two year old knows the name "Barack Obama" because Josiah enjoys doing an impression of him now and then...but I really don't know how she actually recogizes him in a photo shown briefly on TV.
Grace: "I wanta kowawa."
Josiah [confused]: "You want a koala?"
Grace [thinking she's enunciating by speaking louder]: "No! I wanta KO-WAH-WAH." (She wanted cold water.)
Robert: "Hey, Mom! I found Josiah's favorite book of the Bible...Lamentations!" [laughter]
Jason: "Wait a minute...You mean that the telemarketer gets on the blog, but your husband who says clever and witty things all the time doesn't?"
Sunday, November 23, 2008
"If you do it again, I'm putting it on the blog!"
There. I feel better now.
See why Jason (repeatedly) tells people that this blog is cathartic? It saves my sanity.
That, and chocolate.
Friday, November 21, 2008
How I make telemarketers hang up on me
I asked him, "You're not calling from the U.S., are you?"
He stammers for several moments ("Where is that on the script?"), then finally, reluctantly says, "No."
I continue, "...because it's 4:00 in the afternoon here--not morning."
He asks, "Is that a problem?"
I say, "No, go ahead."
He very quickly says, "I'm sorry. Have a good day." AND HANGS UP.
It's an odd feeling when the telemarketer hangs up on you.
Taking his frustration out on ME (the one who caught him...twice), he decided to get a little revenge.
So he hid my pocketbook and my Bible.
I spent some time that night looking around for my Bible, then settled for another one from the bookcase...oh, who am I kidding? From the pile of books and papers on the kitchen table.
When I was getting ready for bed, I realized my pocketbook was missing. I found it in the dark, crawling around to look under the bed, using a flashlight so I wouldn't wake up Grace, who was sleeping peacefully and, no doubt, photogenically, in her crib. I found it under my bed, nearly dead center. It was no accident. And, at that point, I realized the missing Bible was no accident, either.
I eventually found my Bible the next afternoon in a crate where I keep infrequently-used school resources. I had decided to give the unnamed child some extra schoolwork. And there it was, tucked underneath enough things to make it not too obvious that it had been hidden, yet completely hidden from view. In a spot I have never put my Bible.
Now, I can laugh about this little bit of craziness, because I know it could have been a whole lot worse. The thing is, I was looking for my pocketbook because I needed my inhaler. And when you need your inhaler, you generally need it quickly. And the last thing I wanted to be doing was crawling around on the floor, fetching my pocketbook from waaaay underneath a dusty bed.
(For the record, I don't think it ever entered his mind that, by hiding my pocketbook, he would be hiding my inhaler.)
But now I've gotten my revenge by blogging about it, right? BWA-HA-HA! [evil laugh]
Thursday, November 20, 2008
The month of no sleep
This next picture was taken at the zoo. I'm pretty sure this is not what they had in mind when they placed this statue of a "Faithful Horse Groom" at the snow leopard exhibit, but it was the first thing that entered Grace's mind. She immediately ran over to put her beloved baby Emily ("Nimily") in the lap of the Faithful Horse Groom. And then she stood back as though she knew I was going to take a picture.
Grace really enjoyed the petting zoo, but wasn't too excited about actually going inside the petting zoo area. But, you know what? If I were as short as she is, I don't believe I'd go, either. She delighted in telling the animals, "Boys, you can't come out hee-ya [here]!" Over and over again...And, yes, she even wagged her finger at them while saying it.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Yes, Jesus loves me!
--Theologian Karl Barth, when asked what was the greatest thought to have ever passed through his mind.
Grace's exact lyrics:
Jesus loves me, this I know
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones want Him be strong.
He is strong.
Yes, Jesus loves me.
We do want Him to be strong, don't we? And He is strong!
Friday, November 14, 2008
20 guinea pigs and counting
And my feet are softer than they have been in years after doing this for three nights now.
"Was that a rat?!?"
The great outdoors
Josiah loves his little sister. He wanted to give her something new to play with in the back yard in case she was tired of swinging on her swing, so he made her a baby using bricks. He even drew features on the bricks with chalk--a face and clothes.
Grace? She loved it! She sat near her baby, played with her baby, and ran back over to her baby when Josiah made crying noises as the voice of the baby.
Josiah has been anxious to start raking leaves. I told him he could rake whenever he wanted to, so he got busy. Here he is adding to his pile. Note the blue milk crate, the birdbath, and the plank hanging out of the tree (near the upper corner of the photo). I'll say more about that in a minute...
I think he has mostly raked a pile of pine straw from the tired, neglected landscaping. Do you see the green leaves around him on the tree? This is what our trees still look like:
Our trees always seem to be the last ones to drop their leaves on our street. We only have these two trees, but I think these should keep him plenty busy based on what I've seen today. After he added to his pile, the first thing he did was to plop once into the little pile of leaves. Then he was all business...He began using the milk crate like a wheelbarrow to transport the pile of leaves from where it was in the photo above to the (empty) birdbath. He would fill the birdbath with leaves, push them off to make a new pile beside the birdbath, and then refill the milk crate and meticulously repeat the whole process over and over again...Well, until he ran out of leaves! When he tired of this, he perched the milk crate on top of the plank sticking out of the tree and used a tennis racket--yes, a tennis racket--to fill the milk crate with leaves. This didn't work out exactly as planned, though, and...
CRASH. Back to the birdbath...
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Her answer? "'Cause my leg hurt. Cheese will make it better."
Really? Because I thought it was bandaids that will make it all better, judging by the number of bandaids this little girl can go through in a week for a multitude of real and imagined boo boos.
Grace came in from the back yard, crying and holding out her finger.
"My fin-gur hurt, Mommy!"
"Why does your finger hurt?"
"'Cause I put it in some durt."
"Why did you put your finger in dirt?"
"'Cause der was ants in it."
She is Josiah's sister...That is his kind of "logical" explanation!
Grace climbed into our bed last night because she really didn't want to sleep in her "kib." She pulled the sheets up to her chin and without skipping a beat she asked me, "Mommy, can you turn the light off, please?" Too bad--she lost that struggle! She slept in her crib. But first I took a picture, of course.
She doesn't look a bit sleepy, does she?
Sunday, November 9, 2008
The littlest Grandma
Tonight I took this picture of Grace begging for medicine with a completely unconvincing, "Ummm...my belly hurts." What a bummer when you are completely well again and can't get your mom to give you any yummy medicine, huh?
Saturday, November 8, 2008
While you're clicking on links, read this post by Shaun Groves.
If you are curious about Compassion and how it works, read this post from Shaun Groves.
One last thing...Shannon has put together a list of "must reads" by the Compassion bloggers.
Friday, November 7, 2008
I Need You to Tell Me Why
It is pouring down rain, and we are all racing to get into the 4Runner without getting soaked. The guys have all gotten in and I am trying to hurry Grace along into getting her arms in the straps so I can buckle her in. I'm still standing halfway in the rain, and Josiah says, "Mom, can you open that window [indicating the moon roof cover]?"
Jason is sitting in the driver's seat, inches away from the handle of the moon roof cover. I am still outside the car--at the back seat--and yet I am the one who gets asked.
This is not an isolated incident. The kids do this all the time. This is just one of the more exaggerated circumstances.
Why do you think they do this?
Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Update on Grace
Then she asked for a few graham crackers.
Shortly after her little snack (probably the only solid food she'd eaten all day), I was getting her ready for bed and suddenly she started whimpering and crying out. All day I'd been pestering her every single time she made a noise--"Does your belly hurt?"--because I wanted to get her off of carpet in time. And this time she nodded. I ran across the room with her in my arms and made it to the bathroom just in time.
That was a good thing and a bad thing. Good thing: easy clean up. Bad thing: the little girl who hates being messy saw all of the messiness, and it only upset her even more.
(Last night, she happened to be in the bathroom when she threw up. She looked down in horror, shrieked "MESSY!" and ran out of the bathroom to throw up some more on the bedroom floor. She really doesn't like "messy.")
I was trying to be cheerful with her (and to keep her from looking at herself in the mirror) and said in a joking way, "It seems like you just wanted another bath." She looked at me sadly and said, "Yes! Messy!!"
The magical pill is doin' its thing, and hopefully she will sleep better tonight. And hopefully we won't even have to use the magical pill tomorrow, 'cause it's our last one.
Trying to look on the brighter side of things...all of these baths are giving me more opportunities to see freshly washed, sweet baby toes on the bath mat.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
If I'd known what kind of night it was going to be, I would have gotten the Happy Meal
B-E-L-L-Y hurting, but I don't know if she is just wanting
M-E-D-I-C-I-N-E." [...because she is like her brother Josiah and will manufacture complaints just to get medicine, and excitedly jumps up at the mere mention of medicine.]
He walks down the hallway towards the shower. I ask Grace why her belly hurts and she says it's because "Daddy wouldn't give me any peanut butter." OK...when I had left for the Bible study, she hadn't eaten much of her supper. Maybe she was hungry (whether or not it was true that Jason "wouldn't" give her peanut butter)...so I fix her a small spoon of peanut butter. She turns around, takes one step, and then throws up on the spoon of peanut butter.
Jason hadn't been gone even two minutes. I don't think he could have timed that any better.
I had almost cleaned up the kitchen floor when Grace threw up in the next room. That's when I was wishing I had eaten a little more than a few fries. A long night was ahead of us...
By 3 a.m., Grace had thrown up several times. By 3 a.m., after sleeping for one hour and doing three loads of laundry, it occurred to me that she had hit the back of her head that afternoon when she fell on our driveway. So I call the pediatrician's office and after talking with the nurse on call, we are soon on our way to the ER.
Grace was given anti-nausea medicine (which, of course, she loved) and was soon quite perky, despite the fact that she had slept, oh, about 3 1/2 hours, counting the drive over to the ER. Medication that is supposed to make children drowsy typically has the opposite effect with my children.
After waiting, waiting, and more waiting, Grace was taken to have a CAT scan. She had to be strapped down in the papoose to keep her still, and all I could hold of her hands were the tips of her fingers. At one point, she was crying and moaning, "Save me, Mommy!" She may be scarred for life. I managed to hold it together to attempt to comfort her, even with the pleas of "Save me, Mommy!" She didn't stop crying until she had a firm grip around my neck.
After waiting, waiting, and more waiting, we were finally told that the CAT scan was normal, it was probably a virus, and we could leave...eventually...after waiting to get the written orders. It was worth the wait, though, because the doctor gave Grace some of the magical anti-nausea pills in case the vomiting persisted.
It did. And the magical pills are, well, doing their magical thing and letting her sleep now (after the initial perkyness wore off).
One of the highlights of our trip to the ER was when an inmate was brought in at 6 a.m., splattered with blood, with injuries from a fight that broke out at the county jail. His injuries? He had been bitten. Bitten. Through the skin. Needing sutures. And poked in his eye, possibly to the point of doing damage to his vision. He was right next to us on the other side of the curtain in the exam room so I listened closely and kept an eye on his armed guard sitting in the chair at the edge of the curtain. Because, y'all, I've watched way too many episodes of "ER" and you know what always happens whenever a prisoner is brought in. And I wanted to do my part and make sure the guard wasn't overpowered by the handcuffed and shackled prisioner.
Did I mention how little sleep I got last night? :)
A Timely Reminder from Daniel
Too tired to actually post anything...
I wanted to share a post from a blogger who is currently in the Dominican Republic with a group of Compassion bloggers. "Big Mama" is one of the bloggers Jason refers to as my imaginary friends...which is entirely appropriate since she doesn't know I exist, right?
Here is her most recent post. And just below that, if I remember correctly, is where she has links to the other bloggers' sites if you want to read further about this trip.
Click on the banner at the top left corner of my blog if you'd like information about Compassion International or how to sponsor a child!